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5 Ways You May be Sabotaging Your Relationships

5 Ways You May be Sabotaging Your Relationships

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Sometimes it's easier to be safe than sorry or hurt before you get hurt. When it comes to relationships, we all hope we're not getting played. For some, just the thought is too much to bear. So instead of waiting to see if their partner can remain faithful, some people will sabotage a relationship to avoid a heartbreak. Here are 5 ways you may be sabotaging your relationships:

 

1. Thinking you Aren't Good Enough

Self doubt is a bitch! This is an easy way to sabotage, especially if you criticize yourself in front of your partner. It's unattractive to hear a person talk about their flaws and what they hate about themselves. You become your thoughts. Your "I'm not good enough" thoughts will begin to show in your actions. Your partner will notice this also. Be confident that your partner is with you because they enjoy who you are as a person. We all have insecurities, but it's all in how you handle them. Work on that self doubt and love the skin you're in!

2. Always finding something wrong in your partners actions (criticizing, degrading, person doesn't fit your lists)

Do you always find fault in your man? You may say things like "He's too nice, I need him to be more aggressive." or "He's not tall enough." I'm just saying that if he treats you right and makes you happy, does all that other stuff really matter? We've all made up in our minds what our ideal lover looks like, but you're probably not going to get that. God knows what is best for you. Don't lose out on love because it doesn't come in the package that you want it to.

3. You turn small issues into big issues (always complaining, nothing he does is good enough)

Do you complain about everything in your relationship? "We don't spend enough time together." but that turns into "I need space from you." "You don't ever buy me anything." but that turns into "Don't buy me anything cheap." "It seems like you always broke." *man picks up more hours* Damn, you always working!" Sis, which is it?! Are you afraid of having something good in your life? This is one of the main reasons women sabotage relationships. They fear that feeling that things might actually go right this time around. Sometimes people fear getting heartbroken before there are signs of it even happening. They continuously pick the relationship apart. Know that you deserve happiness and embrace it.

4. Ready to break up over anything

Are you ready to leave relationships at the first sign of disagreement? Disagreements are going to happen and shouldn't be used as an escape route. Your partner should be comfortable in expressing their point of view or perspective to you. Don't run at the first sign of trouble. It will only show your partner that you can't handle conflict. This is one of the easiest ways to sabotage a relationship. Just because you don't agree or see eye-to-eye on something doesn't mean your relationship is doomed; you guys just have to work through it.

5. Comparing them to your exes or other peoples significant others

Do you start comparing your current boo to your past boo? Or even worse, do you compare your current boo to your home girl's man/husband? "Well so and so and her man do this, my man doesn't." Newsflash: you should want your man to be his own person! Comparing your man to another man is one of the worst things you can do. For one, you began to notice all their flaws and fail to appreciate all the qualities that make them unique. Number two, don't think for a second your home girl is telling you ALL her man's shortcomings. Three, your ex is your ex for a reason. If you are really stuck on how he treated you, maybe you have unresolved feelings that you need to address.

 

What are some ways you've sabotaged relationships in the past? Or have you been in a relationship that was sabotaged by the other person?

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